She also has other relationships, including a serious boyfriend who lives in the United States, and both her live-in partner and life partner have other relationships as well."Monogamy has never made sense to me, at least as a relationship structure (although I know it works well for other people).
Emotionally, it makes no sense to me to think that my love for one person diminishes my ability to love others.
The reality is that time is finite, and energy is finite, and babies and cultural markers of commitment (from marriage to words like "partner") are finite.
I have yet to see anyone truly carry on a polyamorous relationship that hasn't disintegrated into drama or been reduced down to a monogamous partnership over time.
It's just too much damned work and I, for one, would rather spend my time swimming or devoting myself to a great job or starting a family rather than processing and debugging a complex relationship arrangement for the rest of my life.
I came to recognize that for me, poly was a way of dating and boosting my ego, maintaining social connections, and deflecting codependent tendencies in myself."I have yet to see anyone pull it off without major doses of drama and bullshit and ego and pain. Some poly relationships last a while (like my five year one!
And, that shit gets really tiring.""My earliest exposure to poly was gay couples in "open" relationships.
She was in a polyamorous relationship for five years with a married man that eventually ended after she realized that her partner's relationship with her was interfering with his stated desires to have children with his wife."I considered myself poly for about six years. I was introduced to the concept by someone I had just met.
He had a partner, but explained they were in an open relationship.
I thought it was a great way to remain committed to someone while not feeling restricted sexually to one single person.
However, I got the impression that most of the members of those couples were simply "shopping around" for someone better than their current partner while avoiding the loneliness and isolation of being single."My views on what constitutes polyamory and its theoretical framework have changed, and I gradually came to see it as a legitimate method to challenge the heteronormative frameworks that dictate our lives, frameworks that approve and privilege certain relationships over others.
In that theoretical sense, I would be more likely to engage in polyamory.